Today’s information technology age has brought with it
mixed blessings.  On the one hand, it’s propelled us
into a hyper-efficient work environment.  On the other
hand, advances in technology have fueled mergers and
acquisitions at such an alarming rate that it’s not
uncommon to know at least one person who has been
layed off from work at one time or another.  On
October 16, 2006 I was one of those people. 

I worked for the CEO of an advertising agency, and he
was the first to announce that we’d be going through a
merger in the coming days but that we were to remain
optimistic.  We were to see this as the joining of two
reputable companies-not as a hostile takeover.  I
should have known this naive approach was not the
correct one.  We were a company of artists and
free-thinkers, who came to work in jeans and T-shirts.
 Things started to shift dramatically when men in
suits started filling the hallways.  They visited in
the manner of prison wardens checking  in on the
inmates.  It was not a happy coupling, and it was not
long before that union began to unravel.  The CEO was
the first to go.

At first I scrambled to hold onto my job, thinking
that somehow remaining on a sinking ship was better
than wasting away on dry land.  I could simply stay
afloat by transitioning into another department.  A
new place within a familiar home.  I quickly took
stock of my position and proposed a department switch
to my Human Resources Manager.   But harsh realities
soon set in, and my company declared that they were
not prepared to offer me a better job at the same
salary.  Any of the “fun” and creative positions I
longed for would slash my salary in half.  My only
viable option was to take a lay-off and begin looking
for a new job.

I wasted no time surrounding myself with self-help
books, friends, and frequent visits to the local
coffee shop.  I rediscovered daytime television.  I
decompressed and reassessed my situation on a daily
basis.  Where was I heading?  Where had I been?  In
some ways it was a dream come true.  The liberation
that comes when you kiss the 9-5 workday goodbye is
overwhelming.  You’re left with an endless supply of
energy and buoyant optimism.  Frankly, I had a hard
time comprehending how anyone could work-ever.  I’d go
out for a walk in the middle of the day, surrounded by
others on the street and wonder “Don’t any of these
people work?”  With very little reluctance, I found
myself acclimating to a new and slower daily rhythm.

The same energy that I had expended on commuting and
working and office politics was now being redirected
right back at me.  My only task was to figure out how
to use it wisely.  The world is so alive with things
to do and places to explore, that it’s almost
unfathomable that anyone spends anytime not reveling
in it.  But oh yes, then there’s reality.  There are
bills to be paid, and the rent, groceries, and car
payments.  The list is infinite, so we stay tied to
the comfort of our routine.  We cling to the familiar
while often silently craving the unknown.
Experiencing a layoff is a rare chance to step out of
your comfort zone and seek out a new routine.  One
that suits you for the very place you’re in right now
in your life.  For me, it was looking inside to see
what really made me tick.  What would make me get up
out of bed in the morning if I knew there was no
paycheck waiting in the wings? 



The irony was, my lack of routine was actually making
me crave one even more.  Growing up in a small town,
being educated in a small town, and returning to a
small town after college is the type of lifecycle that
breeds adaptability.  Out of necessity, you think
outside of the box and find new and interesting ways
to entertain yourself.  At age eight, it meant
exploring nearby cornfields on my bike.  At eighteen
it was cliff diving with friends into remote lakes and
ponds.  In my twenties…it was discovering the local
library.  After graduating from college and finding
myself again in a small town, I felt a void left by
the lack of routine that I was used to.  Without the
incentive of attaining a degree, I struggled to find
the discipline to read or study anymore.  I decided
abruptly one day that something would have to change.
I gave myself mock assignments each week designed to
stimulate my intellect and keep me engaged while
living in an otherwise sleepy town.  My method was to
randomly pick a book off the bookshelves until I found
one that piqued my interest, and then commit to
studying it.  I would give myself a mini-quiz at the
end to make sure I had absorbed the major points. 

Now, unemployed and in my thirties, I was left with
seemingly endless amounts of time and an intellect
thirsty for some stimulation.  I turned again to the
local library this time guided by my belief in fate-that things happen for a reason.

A sort of divine timing if you will.  I knew
that my belief had always aligned me with the right
decisions in the past.  This time the challenge was
remembering that fact despite no clear plan laid out
before me.  My belief in fate has always surfaced in surprising
ways, manifesting itself through both subtle and more
obvious signs. 

On one particular day, while in the
library, I received a sign so loud and clear that it
stopped me in my tracks.  I did my usual
thing-randomly picking out a book and deciding to
study and master it in the coming weeks.  This book
happened to be about quilting.  Not a likely topic for
intellectual stimulation, but I found myself drawn to
it nonetheless.  When I skimmed through the pages, I
found images of colorful quilts handcrafted from
around the world.  Most had patterns and recognizable
artistic scenes.  Some had quotes.  One in particular
had a quote that spoke so loudly to me… “It’s always
darkest before the dawn.”   The quote left me
awestruck and mesmerized for the rest of the day.
When I went back towards my house that evening, I
stopped off at a friend’s house to tell her of my
experience.  She reminded me that the quote was from
the bible.  Once again, a powerful reminder that the
roots of my beliefs are far-reaching and have real-world
sensibility.  It was a rare moment when blind faith
actually makes itself visible to the naked eye.  I
took it in and continued to draw strength from the
quote in the days that followed. 

Days leaped into months and I continued forward with
my introspective journey.  I took daily stock of where
I was at both mentally and career-wise, and still
could not believe that I had not fashioned a
definitive plan.  I was getting comfortable in my
routine or lack thereof.  So comfortable in fact, that
it was my friends who would constantly remind me that
I was only in a temporary state of freedom.  I
couldn’t go on forever without working.  I turned to
all of my friends, near and far, to span the gamut of
advice and insight.  I soon realized that using the
mega-search engines for job hunting was like finding a
needle in a haystack.  I’d have to revert to thinking
outside of the box again if I was to be successful in
my job hunt. 

My friends suggested that I open up my search to
included networking.  Attending workshops, going to
seminars, hosting an evening of drinks and going to
industry parties.  Another friend gave me the names of
three media-specific websites that catered only to the
creative crowd.  That at least, would narrow my
competition and focus me in the right direction.
Every friend that I asked for advice gave me their own
perspective on job hunting as well as more
far-reaching long-term advice.  I was struck by their
sage advice and pleasantly reminded of the strong and
powerful friends I had surrounded myself with.  I had
forgotten how beautiful they were when I was caught up
in my daily work routine.  I hadn’t stopped to take
the time to reflect.  The advice they offered was as
colorful as they were and just as diverse.  Talk of
teaching abroad ensued, as well as cashing in on
savings and starting a mini real estate empire.  That
is, if you can call buying small single-family homes
in rural Pennsylvania the beginnings of a real estate
empire.

Again and again I was reminded that any advice was
more of a signature stamp from the people who gave it.
It was a reflection of their own beliefs, not hard
and fast rules.  And it was secondary only to my
faith.  My instinct and faith had guided me towards
this phase in my life, now it was my job to continue
to trust that it would guide me along the right path
in the harder days to follow.  With each passing day,
money being depleted and my inner compass at times
feeling off-balance, I would return again to the quote
that I had passed over in my quilting book.  It
brought up such vivid imagery and elicited warm
feelings of hope every time I thought of it.  
I began stepping out of my comfort zone one day at a time.
Each day I’d commit to sending out at least three
resumes.  Each week, I’d promise myself I’d try one
new avenue in my job search.  And every so often I’d
reassess my plan of action and see how close I was
getting towards my goal of finding employment. 

Along the way, I realized that it’s not about finding
the perfect job.  It’s about allowing the space and
room in your life for the things that you enjoy to be
included.  Reconnecting with friends.  Reconnecting
with your faith.  Finding the job is the natural
result of having everything else in your life properly
aligned and in focus.  You can have a steady job that
keeps you afloat, and still craft your life in such a
way that joy and stimulation come through.  Keeping in
touch with what you value in life, and pursuing rich
interests outside of work is a surefire way to strike
that balance in life. 

It’s now been six full months since my layoff and the
fruits of my labor have paid off.  I find myself at a
new and wonderful company, surrounded by fantastic
coworkers.  It’s the kind of place that you enjoy
walking into everyday, and at the end of each day I
have enough time to myself to sit back and reflect.
Sometimes it can take a small disaster to remind you
of the important things in life.  And sometimes a
temporary set-back can be a blessing in disguise.  You
can use it to reevaluate every avenue of your life and
continue to steer down the path of your choosing.
Above all else, if you allow fate to be your
guide, you will see that it truly is
always darkest before the dawn.

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