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Statuary warning: The purpose of this article is not to promote promiscuous behavior or provide men with an excuse for infidelity.
Sonia and Jay worked in the same office. From day one their falling in love had a surety of fifty percent, i.e. Jay’s fifty. Gradually, the first fifty convinced the second fifty and Jay and Sonia got a 100% married status.
It was wonderful for the first few years for Jay. He was getting an endless supply of sex-on-demand along with the fringe benefits like having his food cooked for him, his clothes ironed and his bed made.
As time passed Sonia was happy with sex twice a week, but Jay wanted it every day. After all, he’d given up single, carefree life for marriage! The more he insisted on sex, the less she wanted it. They started to fight over little things, and were soon seeing only negatives in each other.
One weekend Sonia got delayed at the office. She had a really demanding project to finish. To top it she was drenched in the rain while returning home. All she could think about was going to bed and sleeping. Sex was the last thing on her mind. Jay was also tense. The mortgage repayments were delayed by two months, and the car loan installments were to begin next week. For him sex was the sleeping pill – a sure shot way of releasing the built-up tensions of the day.
It’s an undisputed fact that there are few problems a man can have that great sex won’t fix. Unfortunately, women usually don’t understand this and become resentful at being used.
So, when the bedroom light was finally switched off, Jay tried to cozy up to Sonia. She turned her back and called him an insensitive moron, he called her frigid and went out to sleep on the couch. Things only got worse from here. One lonely night, after their daily slanging-match, Jay went to a friend’s party and met Anita. Their initial attraction soon blossomed into a full-fledged relationship. Sound familiar?
Men are filled to the eyeballs with testosterone – the male hormone responsible for aggression, assertiveness, lust and an insatiable appetite for copulation. It is also the hormone that makes men’s beards grow, causes baldness and deepens voices. Testosterone is released into the blood in five to six waves a day and on a good day, a healthy young man can have sex with the same woman five to six times a day. Thus a continual high dose of testosterone keeps a man’s sex drive high and that is why, when it comes to sex, he’s ever ready.
Estrogen is the female hormone that gives women a feeling of calm, contentment and well-being. It is responsible for women’s nurturing behavior. Progesterone, the other female hormone also supports similar responses and encourages a woman to carry out her child-rearing role successfully.
Female hormones are not regulated like male hormones but come in huge waves over a 28-day cycle and can cause havoc for many women due the rise and fall of emotions that go with them. For the first 21 days after menstruation, estrogen hormones create a feeling of well-being and happiness and give a positive attitude to most women. Between 21-28 days after menstruation, female hormones dramatically drop, creating severe withdrawal symptoms commonly known as PMT – Pre-Menstrual Tension. This causes irritability, depression, feeling of doom and even suicidal tendencies. It can be safely presumed that most of Jay and Sonia’s tiffs took place when she was suffering from PMT.
Ovulation takes place about midway through the cycle. Most women feel the strongest urge for physical sex during ovulation, which can last several hours to several days. Probably Jay met Anita when she was ovulating, and their hormones simply took control.
Human sex center is situated in hypothalamus. Testosterone acts on this area and stimulates the desire for sex. A man’s hypothalamus is much larger than a woman’s. Considering that men are loaded with testosterone and have a larger hypothalamus, it’s obvious why the male sex drive is so puissant. This explains why men can have sex any time, any place. This also explains why sex is the biggest stumbling block in any relationship. Going by this argument keeping a harem seems pretty much logical for a man. No woman, unless she is a sex maniac, can match a man’s sex drive. So where does that leave poor Jay – of course, in the welcoming arms of an ovulating Anita.
Indeed, as far as sex-drive is concerned men and women are poles apart (no pun intended). A man needs to have sex before he can tune in on his woman. His soft, considerate, communicative and charming side emerges after he has had great sex. Unfortunately, a woman needs him to do all that first before she’s turned on to sex. Women need to understand the importance of giving grand sex to men so they can glimpse this softer side, which they find so captivating.
Women are taught by their mothers that men want ‘just one thing’ – sex, but this is not so. Men also want love, but in their dictionary love is a three-letter word spelled – SEX.
Sexually, men and women do seem to inhabit two different planets, light-years apart. If a woman wants to sensually touch a man she runs her fingers through his hair, caresses his face and holds his hands. When a man decides to touch a woman, he goes for her breasts and crotch. This surely is at the top of a woman’s hate list and causes a lot of resentment. She removes his hands abruptly and he takes it for rejection. (And Jay goes for Anita.)
Our magazines, books, television and movies depict women as a highly sexed lot who have an insatiable sexual appetite. Men have been coaxed into believing that modern women have high sex drives. When women don’t behave like sex-maniacs as portrayed by the media, men feel angry and frustrated. In reality, voracious female sex fiends exist only in pornography.
The main cause for a man’s infidelity lies in his being biologically different from a woman. While 99% men say they want a great sex life, sex rates as the top priority for a mere 1% of women. The sexual priorities of men and women are so opposite that it makes no sense to censure either of them. But it will be useful for women to remember that ‘as long as a man is breathing, he is ready for sex’. No point grumbling. It’s just the way he is made!
So what’s the solution? A weirdo suggested not one but two!
Partial castration is the only guaranteed solution to the problem of male infidelity. With lowered testosterone levels men will have enough sex drive to ensure that human species continues, but not enough for polygamy.
Give testosterone to women. Well! This might increase their libido, but then women will have moustaches, beards and bass baritones.
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